We've all done it. We spot someone across the room or overhear someone we're standing with in line at the grocery store. We just know that if we could make a connection, they could become a client or strategic business partner. We rehearse our intro, reach for the business cards and then...chicken out.
At this week's BRN meeting on networking, we talked about FORM. Our FORM is what we say that helps lead into a deeper conversation. FORM is Family, Occupation, Recreation, and Message. These are all great conversation starters that we can work into a conversation with a complete stranger. You don't have to use all of these, but it's something you should think about when the opportunity presents itself.
Family
Take "Family" for instance. You are at your kids soccer game and you sit next to other parents. You might ask, "Oh, do you have a child that's playing?" This leads to you sharing about your kids. As the conversation progresses, you might ask where they are from and eventually what business they are in. Then you exchange cards.
Occupation
"Occupation" is easy to bring up, especially at a networking event. "Tell me about your business" is a great conversation starter.
Recreation
I often use "Recreation" as a conversation starter - especially if I'm waiting to tee off at the golf course. "What's your handicap?" or "Isn't it nice to get away from the office on such a nice day?" Those always start a conversation where I can then ask, "What business are you in?"
Message - not so easy
But the biggest stumbling block is "Message". Many of us are okay with the F-O-R but we don't take the conversation far enough. The message is where, after we exchange business cards, we schedule a follow-up. "I'd like to learn more about your business and what you do. What days are best for you to grab a cup of coffee in the mornings?"
The Exercise
There are several questions you can come up with for each of these lead-ins. Come up with a few on your own and then practice them. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but you'll get better with time. The exercise is to use F-O-R-M and then tell us about it by commenting below.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
You, Mom and the Elavator
If you were taking a two-minute ride up an elevator with your mom, what would you tell her about your business? Could she then turn around and give that same basic sales pitch to her friends to tell them what you do. It's an interesting concept, especially when most people take their two minutes to hawk their products and services rather than explain what they do.
To Pitch or Not to Pitch
Some healthy debate came when a couple of BRN members said they preferred not to give elevator pitches because they either sound canned or it didn't fit their personality. A guest brought up the point that they were told that their elevator pitch should be no more than 30 seconds. Another person weighed in that we should all have 10-12 elevator pitches that we can pull out depending on the audience and situation. Those are all valid points.
But what happens when you find yourself in a networking meeting where you are given the opportunity or asked, "take a couple of minutes to tell us about your business"? Do you stop at the 30-second mark? Do you only offer a 10-second tag line and yield the rest of your time? Should you offer an elevator pitch that is not well-rehearsed and sounds canned?
Practice Makes Perfect
We took time in our meeting to address six questions that an elevator pitch must address:
Homework
The homework this week is to refine our elevator pitches and post them here for others to review and critique. Even if you didn't attend the meeting, please feel free to participate in this exercise.
Happy pitching!
To Pitch or Not to Pitch
Some healthy debate came when a couple of BRN members said they preferred not to give elevator pitches because they either sound canned or it didn't fit their personality. A guest brought up the point that they were told that their elevator pitch should be no more than 30 seconds. Another person weighed in that we should all have 10-12 elevator pitches that we can pull out depending on the audience and situation. Those are all valid points.
But what happens when you find yourself in a networking meeting where you are given the opportunity or asked, "take a couple of minutes to tell us about your business"? Do you stop at the 30-second mark? Do you only offer a 10-second tag line and yield the rest of your time? Should you offer an elevator pitch that is not well-rehearsed and sounds canned?
Practice Makes Perfect
We took time in our meeting to address six questions that an elevator pitch must address:
- What is your product or service?
- Who is your market?
- What is your revenue model?
- Who is behind the company?“
- Who is your competition?
- What is your competitive advantage?
Homework
The homework this week is to refine our elevator pitches and post them here for others to review and critique. Even if you didn't attend the meeting, please feel free to participate in this exercise.
Happy pitching!
Friday, March 6, 2009
Humility, Listening & Leadership, a Rare Combination?
When many people think about leadership they think about the ‘big dog’ or the ‘alpha male.’ So what role does humility and listening play in leadership?
According to Jim Collins, the author of Good to Great (2001), humility plays a huge role in the MOST EFFECTIVE EXECUTIVES. He describes Level 5 leadership as the style which takes companies from being merely good to being great.
This is a rare phenomena. Such leaders are rare as well. Indeed, these qualities are very similar to servant leadership.
According to Collins, Level 5 leaders: “Build enduring greatness through a paradoxical blend of personal humility and professional will.” (p. 20)
Interestingly, Collins was shocked to find that Level 5 leaders did not have “high profile personalities were not celebrities, they were self-effacing, quiet, reserved, and even shy.”
Why does this matter? Because it will only be the great companies that will survive this depression, if you can call it that.
Without going through today’s headlines there is no lack of hubris among the stories of corporate indulgence and selfishness. This is why our topic this week was Humility, Listening and Leadership.
What did we learn from our discussion?
This economy is humbling to us all. We all have stories of loss of business, loss of jobs, loss of status, loss of money, even loss of houses.
We all have something to learn from this and we are learning.
Yet the question is what can you learn from being humbled?
Craig, a guest, made a powerful point: “When you are humbled you move out of your head and get back to your heart. When you operate from your heart it is where the servant in you comes through.” He elaborated that he thinks of his customers as hoping to finance their dreams and his job is to help them to express their dream of owning their own business.
Mark, a regular member, noted pithily: “Show up and listen.” That is the new sales strategy, discussed at a recent Ball State University conference on sales, instead of the old paradigm of “Show up and throw up” where the sales man simply tells everything he knows about the product and hopes to score a sale. Now it is about the relationship you form with people. That requires listening. Listening requires humility.
Joe a long time member and business owner pointed out that his goal is to have his company succeed him and his sons are in that company. He said he has always operated from a humble approach to people and he felt the same was true of his sons. This further reinforces that approach.
Matt, another regular, noted that he wasn’t raised to show humility or to ask for help for that matter: “Never let em’ see you sweat.” He has more recently been embracing humility and realizing he needs help from other people to borrow from their strengths. Yet admitting that you need help is hard.
Kathy had a story of how in college she learned to ask for help by working in a group. Again, it is hard and she was raised like Matt - don’t ask for help. Yet, we all need help today.
Doug pointed out that in humility are lessons about ethics, spirituality and morals. He had experienced enough of that to warrant an Ivy League Education! He also noted that the leader of the organization sets the tone for behavior in the organization: humility or bashing and blaming others, which do you choose?
Brian noted that he once had the distinct displeasure of being privy to a conference call in which he was lambasted. Yet, he took it as constructive criticism and learned from it. It stoked his fire to get better and he did.
As usual in BRN meetings, the conversation was rich and deep. It further clarified what is true leadership for us. Humility is absolutely essential. Maybe it is our Indiana values of humility over arrogance, but it truly seems deeper than that as Jim Collins study suggested.
My story involved a mentor of mine, Jim Miller, ACSW. He has been in central Indiana mentoring and shepherding social work and other agencies through transitions with great humility and perseverance. One of his most essential qualities and a companion to humility is that he truly listens. He listened to me as a 20 year old. My confidence burgeoned. He had a continuing impact upon me. Now, I as a 44 year old try to emulate the master and listen to hear what others have to share: clients, kids, customers, friends, my wife, my family whomever. I hope to grasp what I might be missing because we all need to find a new way to make our path through these treacherous times. The candor and humility people in our group showed in these discussions is a light in the darkness. We will make it through together, by listening and with humility.
Charles Shinaver, Ph.D. co-founder Business Roundtable Network (www.brncommunity.com)
According to Jim Collins, the author of Good to Great (2001), humility plays a huge role in the MOST EFFECTIVE EXECUTIVES. He describes Level 5 leadership as the style which takes companies from being merely good to being great.
This is a rare phenomena. Such leaders are rare as well. Indeed, these qualities are very similar to servant leadership.
According to Collins, Level 5 leaders: “Build enduring greatness through a paradoxical blend of personal humility and professional will.” (p. 20)
Interestingly, Collins was shocked to find that Level 5 leaders did not have “high profile personalities were not celebrities, they were self-effacing, quiet, reserved, and even shy.”
Why does this matter? Because it will only be the great companies that will survive this depression, if you can call it that.
Without going through today’s headlines there is no lack of hubris among the stories of corporate indulgence and selfishness. This is why our topic this week was Humility, Listening and Leadership.
What did we learn from our discussion?
This economy is humbling to us all. We all have stories of loss of business, loss of jobs, loss of status, loss of money, even loss of houses.
We all have something to learn from this and we are learning.
Yet the question is what can you learn from being humbled?
Craig, a guest, made a powerful point: “When you are humbled you move out of your head and get back to your heart. When you operate from your heart it is where the servant in you comes through.” He elaborated that he thinks of his customers as hoping to finance their dreams and his job is to help them to express their dream of owning their own business.
Mark, a regular member, noted pithily: “Show up and listen.” That is the new sales strategy, discussed at a recent Ball State University conference on sales, instead of the old paradigm of “Show up and throw up” where the sales man simply tells everything he knows about the product and hopes to score a sale. Now it is about the relationship you form with people. That requires listening. Listening requires humility.
Joe a long time member and business owner pointed out that his goal is to have his company succeed him and his sons are in that company. He said he has always operated from a humble approach to people and he felt the same was true of his sons. This further reinforces that approach.
Matt, another regular, noted that he wasn’t raised to show humility or to ask for help for that matter: “Never let em’ see you sweat.” He has more recently been embracing humility and realizing he needs help from other people to borrow from their strengths. Yet admitting that you need help is hard.
Kathy had a story of how in college she learned to ask for help by working in a group. Again, it is hard and she was raised like Matt - don’t ask for help. Yet, we all need help today.
Doug pointed out that in humility are lessons about ethics, spirituality and morals. He had experienced enough of that to warrant an Ivy League Education! He also noted that the leader of the organization sets the tone for behavior in the organization: humility or bashing and blaming others, which do you choose?
Brian noted that he once had the distinct displeasure of being privy to a conference call in which he was lambasted. Yet, he took it as constructive criticism and learned from it. It stoked his fire to get better and he did.
As usual in BRN meetings, the conversation was rich and deep. It further clarified what is true leadership for us. Humility is absolutely essential. Maybe it is our Indiana values of humility over arrogance, but it truly seems deeper than that as Jim Collins study suggested.
My story involved a mentor of mine, Jim Miller, ACSW. He has been in central Indiana mentoring and shepherding social work and other agencies through transitions with great humility and perseverance. One of his most essential qualities and a companion to humility is that he truly listens. He listened to me as a 20 year old. My confidence burgeoned. He had a continuing impact upon me. Now, I as a 44 year old try to emulate the master and listen to hear what others have to share: clients, kids, customers, friends, my wife, my family whomever. I hope to grasp what I might be missing because we all need to find a new way to make our path through these treacherous times. The candor and humility people in our group showed in these discussions is a light in the darkness. We will make it through together, by listening and with humility.
Charles Shinaver, Ph.D. co-founder Business Roundtable Network (www.brncommunity.com)
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Oh Lord It's Hard to Be Humble
Reminds me of a song...
Mac Davis, a country singer and songwriter, used to sing "Oh Lord it's hard to be humble, when you're perfect in every way..." But, it's in those humbling moments that we find out just how imperfect we really are. I related an experience about joining in on a conference call just as my colleagues (who had no idea I was on the call) began a 10 minute assault on me. I could have gotten off of the call, but I chose to listen in. As painful as it was, I listened to their criticism and took the necessary steps to "readjust" my approach and heal some key relationships. It was like attending my own funeral. But I got another chance. That was a GREAT lesson in humility.
We heard from others today that have lost jobs, missed opportunities, taken steps back financially, made poor business decisions and struggled to find their "professional selves".
Listen Closely
We also talked about listening and being better tuned into our clients/customers and our industry. We hear so much in the news about the economy and businesses that are struggling, but what is it our customers and peers are telling us? Do we ask? Do we really listen? Do we react? What adjustments can we make to our businesses by being better listeners.
Lessons to Practice
We left with these 5 Lessons In Humility
This Week's Exercise
Everyone is asked to focus on humility and listening. When something happens in either of those areas this week, tell us 1) what the situation was 2) how you felt and 3) what you did and 4) what the other person(s) reaction was. Post your experience(s) below.
Mac Davis, a country singer and songwriter, used to sing "Oh Lord it's hard to be humble, when you're perfect in every way..." But, it's in those humbling moments that we find out just how imperfect we really are. I related an experience about joining in on a conference call just as my colleagues (who had no idea I was on the call) began a 10 minute assault on me. I could have gotten off of the call, but I chose to listen in. As painful as it was, I listened to their criticism and took the necessary steps to "readjust" my approach and heal some key relationships. It was like attending my own funeral. But I got another chance. That was a GREAT lesson in humility.
We heard from others today that have lost jobs, missed opportunities, taken steps back financially, made poor business decisions and struggled to find their "professional selves".
Listen Closely
We also talked about listening and being better tuned into our clients/customers and our industry. We hear so much in the news about the economy and businesses that are struggling, but what is it our customers and peers are telling us? Do we ask? Do we really listen? Do we react? What adjustments can we make to our businesses by being better listeners.
Lessons to Practice
We left with these 5 Lessons In Humility
- “My customers know things that I don’t – so I will ask them what they want.”
- “My employees know more about the implementation of their jobs than I do – so I will elicit their input and be receptive to their ideas.”
- “Neither my employees nor I can be creative all the time – so we’ll solicit ideas from everyone we know including customers, vendors, friends, family and consultants.”
- “What I knew yesterday is not enough for today – so I will be receptive to suggestions about introducing new products and services, implementing new concepts and embracing new ways of doing business.”
- “I need to demonstrate that I am listening and paying attention to customers’ needs – so I will respond to phone calls, emails and other inquiries in a timely manner.”
Practicing these five degrees of humility will make you a better business professional and a better person. In the words of the 19th-century philosopher and art critic John Ruskin: "The first test of a truly great man is his humility."
This Week's Exercise
Everyone is asked to focus on humility and listening. When something happens in either of those areas this week, tell us 1) what the situation was 2) how you felt and 3) what you did and 4) what the other person(s) reaction was. Post your experience(s) below.
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